Have you ever

Watched a movie or heard a story and thought to yourself "man, I just don't think I would have the strength." That is my life right now, right this very second. Today I had a breakdown. I cried silently as long as I could but there are moments not matter how strong you are you just can not keep it in. Brinley telling me not to cry were the last words she spoke to me today and the first time I seen her 10 hrs later she was, well words cant describe. It is so hard to hold in the fact you just want to grab your baby and run away. To tell them to stop hurting her, to just let her be, when all they are doing is actually SAVING her life. Because of them she gets to LIVE. As a mom you would lay down your own life for your children. Please squeeze your babies extra tight tonight. I left my baby behind at hospital alone so that she may rest. The last thing I saw her do was try to pull her own ventilato

r out and a pacemaker laying beside her with 3 drainage tubes coming from her belly. Tonight I will stay awake all night to regain my composure so that tomorrow when they wake her up I will be the first face her beautiful eyes see.